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I’ve been racking my brain and cannot find a way to make what I have to say even the least bit witty or inspiring. So I’m just going to tell ya’ll and move on. Thanks for all of the happy encouraging comments on the ummmm post.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t want to have a tearfest. I did that already. Yesterday morning when I woke up and realized what was happening. I got back in bed. Pulled the covers over my head. And proclaimed to J that nothing could make me get out of bed. And God quickly prompted me to remember that my son’s best friend’s mom was going to church with us. For the first time. And that nagging little thought would not leave my brain. So I got up. And life goes on.
If I weren’t So freakin intuitive and didn’t KNOW my body as well as I do, I wouldn’t have even realized it. I would have passed it off as late and heavy. So, is ignorance bliss? In this case I would have to say yes! Unequivocally yes.
The thing that really gets me, is that I was *quite content without a ‘Thing 6′. Until there was one. And the second I realized it, the desire of my heart changed completely. Now I want a Thing 6. And it’s not there anymore. So what was the point?
I’m straight though. It’s all good. I know there is a plan. But I didn’t get the memo yet, so I admit I am absolutely clueless as to what the actual plan is. But really, how is that part different from any other day.
2 Comments:
- I am so sorry sweety. I have never experienced the loss you have just had so I don’t know quite what to say except that I am sorry. And to agree that God does have a plan for your life. And you will meet your sweet Thing 6 one day, for now he or she is in the loving arms of Jesus looking forward to meeting you & daddy – and the rest of the things. I hope that when the time is right God will fulfill the desire of your heart and bless you with a Thing 7.
- I’m so sorry to hear about this. I *think* the same thing happened to me a few months ago, but I hadn’t gotten around to taking the test before *it* happened. So I don’t know. But I feel your pain and you’re in my thoughts and prayers!
You know that 1 nerve that we all have. Yes, the last 1. As in “You are getting on my last nerve!” How do you really know it’s the last one? What if there are more, secret nerves that come out to replace all of the ones that you’ve lost. And where exactly do all of those nerves go?
I have been on my last nerve for days now. If, in fact it is the very last one. It’s frazzled and frayed and falling apart. And there are these things hanging from it…as in Thing 1 and Thing 2 and Thing 3 and Thing 4 and not~so~much Thing 5 but *most definently the biggest Thing of them all. I think they think it’s a tight rope or something b/c they’re doing tricks on it. Pulling it down. Yanking on it and bouncing on top of it. I’m afraid it’s going to snap, and they’re all going to fall down.
It’s not thier fault really. They are just doing what they were designed to do ~ kinda like monkeys in the zoo, hanging around doing odd monkey~things.
But I have been waiting for a visitor…who seems to have bailed. Maybe it’s lost with all of those nerves. But this is a very important visitor. You know the one that we all dread each month until it doesn’t show up. Ya that’s the one. Have you seen it? Did it stop by to visit you first? If you do see it, please send it my way.
I’m freaking out here. Just a little. Can you tell? I can’t help it. Everywhere I go it’s babies and more babies. Or women who are about to have babies. What if it’s in the water? I should stop drinking water. Don’t get me wrong. I love babies. I’m very very prone to getting ‘baby fever’. That’s why we have 5 already. But I’m trying NOT to get baby fever ’cause Thing 5 just turned 1 yr and it’s about that time…..lol. But right now ALL I can think of are all the reasons that it would NOT be good timing.
Are you listening God? We have NO room. And I don’t mean no room as in, “We could rearrange if we had to.” I mean we have no room as in, we were buying a house that fell through and ended up in a 34ft Rv. With 5 kids. SO either send ‘the visitor’ or send a house. And if You want … I could use some more nerves too. Because as You read above, I’m down to my last 1.
- Hi Heather!
It’s Heather, from Heather’s little hearts, and many other blogs. :OP I have 1 at HSB (for homeschooling etc.) & 3 at blogger. One for my silly children, one for my spiritual/homemaking etc., and eventually the last will be a Home Management Binder type blog–mostly for home stuff.
Your not alone.
Hey, take a breath! If God gives you another child, then it is His will. I know how you feel! I felt SO overwhelmed after I had my fifth child that I was almost ready to stop…the LORD gave me an almost 2-year break, and then I had my sixth. She has been a delight to me!
Then as you read in my testimony, I had an ectopic. That was almost more than I could handle. God had opened my heart to another baby…then took the baby away! I trust in everything the Lord has in store for me, I trust His will completely and I know NOTHING, absolutely NOTHING, happens outside of HIS will. If you need a shoulder, I’m here! But so is GOD.
If you ever just want to vent, send me a message through HSB. I always have a listening ear, even if I have to stay up late for it (hey, who has six kids that doesn’t stay up late?).
Blessings!
Heather - WOW!!! I will be praying for you girl, like you said – either the visitor or a house ~ or both?!
Actually it sounds like you could use a house regardless if the visitor comes so I’ll pray for that period. Ha, that sounds different than I intended, I meant I will pray for that regardless.
- Umm . You know if you read that … you said to send a house cause you have no room . Well you have your house now with plenty of room…. THAT DOESN`T MEAN THERE CAN BE A THING 6 !
lollove ya :]
- but BRIT we still have 2 seats left in the truck. What else are we supposed to do with them?????
They said WHAT?