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Have you ever seen that movie Bruce Almighty? It’s not new or anything. And I haven’t seen it recently. I’m not really sure why I was even thinking about it. SO…we’ll just…come back to this later. When I actually have something to say about it. Sound good? Good!
You wanna know what drives me crazy about trying to tell ya’ll stuff sometimes? Words just don’t look the way I say them. like, how often do you talk like this? Where every word is just clipped off neatly at the end. NO emphasis. No pronunciation. It’s just …wierd. Ooooor maybe it’s just me? No. You’re supposed to say NO.
I was thinking about when Thing 1 ~9yob~ was like 2. Closer to 3. But still 2. He has always been SO self reliant. He can & wants to do everything for himself. This was an extremely annoying trait to me when he was my only *baby. When I had all the time in the world ~ or atleast all the time in the day ~ to cater to his every little desire. But now, that there are 4 more not~so~self~reliant..make that 5 more, I am singin the hallelujah chorus.
I have a point. I just haven’t gotten you to it yet. Hang on. I’m getting there.
All we need is just a little patience…..
I was talking to a RL friend (1 of the many 2) who I LOVE and we were talking about Thing 4. And how I have to make sure that no matter what I am always always up & at the very least, semi~coherent BEFORE he wakes up. Or Chaos will reign. & that is just *not the way I roll 
That made me remember when Thing 1 was like 2.
& he woke up first. And apparently… had a little time on his hands…before he came into our room all happy & excited. He made us breakfast. Just like daddy does. Cause he loves us so much. Ain’t that just the sweetest thing?
You can see where this is going can’t you? 2 yr old. Unsupervised. Kitchen.
Say it with me now… a recipe forrrrrrrrrrrr…… what? I can’t hear you.
OmGOODNESS let me just tell you what we walked into. A lovely breakfast buffet. Uncooked ’scrambled eggs’ ~the good kind~shells & all~ beautifully arranged on the front doormat. 3 bowls sat ontop of the coffee table. Full of jello. And cheerios. And milk. Yummy. A nice contemporary look ….a walkway made of cheerios & grape jelly …led us into the kitchen.
Need I go on?
I find it oddly funny that the girls *Thing 2 & Thing 3, (Thing 5 is not old enough yet…thankfully;) who love love LOVE to be in the kitchen with me, have never experimented on thier own. And NOT because they are less adventurous. Trust me. I have had walls decorated with you~don’t~even~want~to~know~what that just toss that theory right out the window.
Maybe it’s a girl thing. Thou shall respect the kitchen. The kitchen shall become your friend. I really like the kitchen. Not so much, my kitchen. Just the kitchen in general, as a room.
I don’t know why. I can only cook good enough to not starve my family. That’s about it. OH but I make a *mean sausage gravy & biscuits. And pasta. And chicken. And porkchops. Okay, maybe I’m not as bad of a cook as I thought. I must have gotten a little better since the last time I checked. & That’s always a good thing.
7 Comments:
- Oh what fun memories. They are such a pain at the time…but such sweet things to remember. Noah is SO much more laid back then Anna…buuuuuuuuuuuttttt, I don’t know…they could probably run a tight race in making the biggest mess….remember…boogers on the wall…AAAAAnnnnnnnddd so on. Catch ya later girlie!
Charity - That is great. Seriously. I’d so rather have funny stuff like that to look back on then having the most perfectly well behaved child. We haven’t gotten the breakfast surprise yet but we have gotten plenty of surprises involving spreading diaper messes on walls, crib, blankets, toys, bathtub, etc. My mother in law told me that my husband and her brother once dumped everything ‘dumpable’ in the kitchen onto the floor. Wet, dry – all food that they could reach had been poured out.
- this sounds a lot like what goes on in our house!! Sometimes I have good intentions of making a “teaching lesson” out of me cooking and having my kids watch but it always ends up in disaster!! We have 5 kids too and all of them would love the opportunity to paint the walls with anything lying around!! You’re such a breath of fresh air–knowing that I am not alone in this mommyhood “battle”of wills!
I raise my mostly empty and already spilled, cookie infested, plastic juice cup to you
- No pictures? I want pictures. This is sooooo hilarious. Somewhere I have a picture of my 1 and 2yo’s covered in flour. No one’s ever attempted meals though. I also have a picture of the dandelions my dd picked for me when she was about 4yo. She put them in a dixie cup….’bout 9 dixie cups to be more specific. They were all over the bathroom sink.
Which reminds me, I did blog about the PBJ my 5yo attempted to make awhile back. The photos said it all (all the way down to the shattered jar of grape jello on my kitchen floor).
http://inthemidstofthisseason.blogspot.com/2007/02/im-not-much-of-long-term-planner.html
Yep, would love to see photos of your breakfast chef’s work. You did take them, yes?
Blessings,
~Toni~ - LMAOO !! I remember when Tristan did that ! haha … well i don’t remember myself … cause i was like … young ? Well . i was like … 9? idk but i remember you telling me about that ….or maybe i actually REMEMBER it … ok bear with me now ..
WHAT ABOUT BRUCE ALMIGHTY ??!?!!? it’s killing me . why would you start like that and then leave us hangingg !! uhhh !
- lol @ charity’s boogers on the wall (only cause I’ve BEEN there!!!)
ooooooh Becca been there too ~ just wait till yours want to surprise you;)
tegdirb92 thank you! I love your blog! And to you I raise my glass…er plastic cup…of cheeto infested sweet tea which is also already been spilled & is half empty.
TOni I KNOW i know but that was like 7 yrs ago BEFORE I got digital. So I have a pic somewhere…
Brit I will call you & tell you about Bruce Almighty. lol. & it wouldn’t surprise me if you remember it
- LOL! I would have freaked at that sight! What a lovely mess, but at least it was made with love. Too funny.
And I’m sure you’re a better cook than you think. There are so many easy recipes out there that you really have to TRY to screw up.
I give up.
Rockyou! is NOT rocking me right now.
I knocked out last night. I am officially sick of being sick. I don’t usually get sick. I don’t usually get sick to the point where I can’t just ignore it & go about my day. My poor kids. They haven’t learned a thing since last Monday.
Okay. To be fair to myself, and my awesome teaching abilities, they have actually still learned a few things.
Like how to make it look like you’ve done things..
when you haven’t really done a thing.
How to feed your family every night…
without ever turning on the oven.
How to get a movie at bedtime…
by sweet talkin daddy while mommy’s knocked out in a Nyquil~induced~coma.
How mommy will be SO agreeable to anything (including, but not limited to, an ultra healthy breakfast of sausage pizza~banana split pudding~& cheeze its) if you just be quiet while you’re doing it.
Not exactly my plan for our curriculum. Or anything close to my “Good Mom” to do list.
13 Comments:
- That breakfast menu was funny! I hope you are feeling better soon!!
- LOL, I just posted about being sick on my blog this past week too. But I bet you didn’t look like you only had a 2nd grade math education, nor did your family look like the Beverly Hillbillies. It’s all in a good bout of “the bug” for me.
Blessings,
~Toni~
http://inthemidstofthisseason.blogspot.com/2007/04/yellow-alert.html - Oops, I also meant to say those other lessons were muy important as well. I can’t seem to find them in my curriculum though (I think homeschool moms could write an entire “curriculum” about life lessons learned at home).
Blessings,
~Toni~ - I’m so sorry you’ve been sick! ICK! and I have enjoyed reading this entire page of yer blog! (((((HUGS))))) sandi
- What?, wait, you mean sausage pizza for breakfast, microwave meals and movies all night long isn’t a normal mommy thing? Dang, I guess I missed that memo I hope you feel better very soon and get back into your normal routine. If anything I think your kids are learning grace this week. Grace grace.
- We all have those days. And weeks. And months. And sometimes even years. This too shall pass. Hope you get to feeling better soon!
Blessings ~ Diane - I sure understand this post. Been there, done that.
Thanks for stopping by!
Lori
- I think I may be one of your kids… that sounds like my exact routine. lol. Seriously, you are still sick? Allergies or more flu-like…? I’m sorry because you sound like you don’t want to be. I like being sick. Er–is that sick in itself?
- We were sick too for about 3 weeks. It was terrible. I think we’re finally over it. Thanks for stopping by my WW post today! Hope you’re feeling better soon!
- these last couple of weeks have been somewhat unproductive for us. That rotten cold gets a hold of you and doesn’t let go. Keep the Nyquil near by.
- I know what you mean about being tired of being sick. I’ve been feeling a little cruddy but I think it’s allergies. Hope you feel better soon.
- I hate being sick. Had shingles not too long ago- no fun at all.
- Thank you so much. I am feeling slightly human again
Maybe I am. Okay I probably am. BUT. I’m drawn to the whole idea of unschooling. I don’t know why. Maybe God is trying to tell me something. OR maybe it just sounds cool.
I like the idea of Anti School. Is that a valid homeschooling choice? Or did I just make it up? Hey maybe I can write a parenting book about it. It’ll be a best seller. Ya’ll would buy it. Wouldn’t you? Of course you would. How else would it be a best seller?
SO I’m thinking of trying this ‘unschooling’ thing. Atleast for the summer. But there’s a teeny tiny problem. It’s the ugly anal~retentive~perfectionism thing rearing it’s ugly head again. I would just knock it out with a cast iron skillet but that would hurt ME. I’ll have to come up with another solution.
How about ya’ll? Any unschoolers out there? What do you do? How do you do it? Does it involve lists? Is it totally sick that I hope it does? SEE that’s the anal thing I’m talking about. Obsessive Compulsive LISTMAKER. There. I said it. Now you don’t have to. Really. Don’t say it.
I know. I have serious problems. I’m workin on it. There’s no pill for it. I’ve checked. Okay not really. I’m a wimp. I don’t like pills. But I thought it might make you feel better to think I was actively seeking help.
2 Comments:
- Well, I haven’t done any kind of homeschooling yet so I don’t know anything about the ‘unschooling’ stuff but it does sound interesting. However, I am totally with you on the listmaking!! I love to make lists & even more, checking stuff off as I finish the task or get the item or do whatever it says I need to do. If the unschooling doesn’t involve lists I’m sure you’ll be able to make up your own anyway. Hope you find what works for you!
- Heather . Doll. and you say i have problems ?!?!
lol
Tis why you are my favoritest aunt though !
I’ve been racking my brain and cannot find a way to make what I have to say even the least bit witty or inspiring. So I’m just going to tell ya’ll and move on. Thanks for all of the happy encouraging comments on the ummmm post.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t want to have a tearfest. I did that already. Yesterday morning when I woke up and realized what was happening. I got back in bed. Pulled the covers over my head. And proclaimed to J that nothing could make me get out of bed. And God quickly prompted me to remember that my son’s best friend’s mom was going to church with us. For the first time. And that nagging little thought would not leave my brain. So I got up. And life goes on.
If I weren’t So freakin intuitive and didn’t KNOW my body as well as I do, I wouldn’t have even realized it. I would have passed it off as late and heavy. So, is ignorance bliss? In this case I would have to say yes! Unequivocally yes.
The thing that really gets me, is that I was *quite content without a ‘Thing 6′. Until there was one. And the second I realized it, the desire of my heart changed completely. Now I want a Thing 6. And it’s not there anymore. So what was the point?
I’m straight though. It’s all good. I know there is a plan. But I didn’t get the memo yet, so I admit I am absolutely clueless as to what the actual plan is. But really, how is that part different from any other day.
2 Comments:
- I am so sorry sweety. I have never experienced the loss you have just had so I don’t know quite what to say except that I am sorry. And to agree that God does have a plan for your life. And you will meet your sweet Thing 6 one day, for now he or she is in the loving arms of Jesus looking forward to meeting you & daddy – and the rest of the things. I hope that when the time is right God will fulfill the desire of your heart and bless you with a Thing 7.
- I’m so sorry to hear about this. I *think* the same thing happened to me a few months ago, but I hadn’t gotten around to taking the test before *it* happened. So I don’t know. But I feel your pain and you’re in my thoughts and prayers!
So, I’ve been contemplating this whole easter thing and am curious how you wiew this holyday. or holiday, if it’s not holy to you. What exactly does this day mean to you?
I’ve always just taught my kids that the easter bunny ~along with santa & the tooth fairy~ is kinda like Barney. Pretend. Something fun and nonsensical (I know. But you KNOW how I feel about Encarta. And I really *wasn’t sure if it was a word) It’s something we do to humor grandma & grandpa. But they know the TRUTH. ANd they have no problem telling it to anyone. Whether you ask or not. SOmetimes this is not such a good thing. Like when it makes thier friends cry. And then causes angry parents to call me at night. That’s not so fun.
Parent: How could you do that to your child?
Me:How could I do what? *Not lie to them?
I don’t care if you do the ’santa/easter bunny thing. I don’t tell my kids you’re evil incarnate because of it. But WHY would you call and ask me that question? I don’t call you and ask why you tell your children a big bunny comes in the middle of the night laying eggs and leaving easter baskets. I’m sorry my child made yours cry and ask if you were lying. We had a talk about it. Really. But he was smarter than me & I had no clue how to come back from his reply.
Me: You know… I know what we believe, but everyone else doesn’t believe that. ANd you made your friends cry. So maybe we shouldn’t say anything to them about it. Thier parents want to tell them something else. And we should respect that.
Thing 1: I thought the bible tells us to tell the truth about Jesus.
Me: It does.
Thing 1: Then why do you want me to lie to my friends? You always tell me not to lie.
Me, *desperately trying to reason with this boy so I don’t have to be screamed at by any more parents: I don’t want you to lie. I just don’t want you to say anything about it.
Thing 6: That’s still NOT telling the truth about Jesus.
There was nothing else I could say. I was out wisdom’ed by a (then) 7 yr old.
So you see, it’s not my fault. He knows how to read. And he has good taste in books. And great life application skills. WOW homeschooling really does pay off! Who’dda thunk it? (I can’t help it. There is just something about that word. I know. It’s like a sickness or something.)
All of that to say Have a happy ‘He’s alive’ day. Or happy EasterBunny day. Or whatever you are celebrating tomorrow:)
- I’ve been debating this bunny business also. My oldest is two so he hasn’t asked yet and we haven’t brought it up. Except last year at an egg hunt at a park he was frightened to take a photo with said bunny. I like the pretending idea, still doing the egg hunts (and stuffing stockings) without that being the focus of the holiday. And it looks like thing 1 got ya there. I’d say its compliments to your parenting. And in the long run I think you’d rather remember phone calls from parents knowing your child wasn’t afraid to share his faith.
- lol Becca. How can I argue with such a good point?
I think I’ve become ‘that mom’. No, not that mom, the other one. You know, the mom whose mind has completely evaporated to the point that she can’t remember her child’s name until she gets to it as she goes down the list. I’ve caught myself doing that SO many times lately.
One of my~little~blessings in disguise, will do something they aren’t supposed to do (did I mention that they’re not perfect either?) and I will start to call ‘em on it, and then I caaaalllll the wrong name. That’s when the list starts. And by the time I get it right, I am either (a.) feeling SO guilty (& more stupid than I care to admit) for not knowing my own child’s name that I can’t bring myself to continue or (b.) walking out of the room looking stern but really trying not to totally lose it because they cannot contain the amusement that they get from watching mommy act insane. It’s a very effective discipline method, if you haven’t guessed. . Maybe I can use it somehow to create a new *style of parenting and make millions. Whadd’ya think? (that word looks weird to me, but I like it anyway)
“What can we do?”, you ask. Don’t ask me, I have no brain left remember? But you better start thinking quick because you could lose yours at any time too!!
It’s Okay. You can rest easy. No need to stay up all night stressing about it. I think I’ve come up with a solution.
I must end the disillusion of my insanity…. ( Which translated roughly means: yes I’m quite aware that I have lost it ~ whatever it was to begin with ~ I can’t really remember anymore exactly what it was ~ but we are going to pretend that I haven’t. Someone who doesn’t know me might come along and read this, and want to think that I still have it. And we don’t want to scare them off. So be a nice bloggyreader and just play along. *I’ll pay you later* )
….I am going to give them all the same name. That way, I can never get it wrong. And more importantly, I will look sane.
I know how important it is for children to have their own individual identities. So, I’ll give them different middle names. And while I’m at it, I might as well change my Love’s name too. I don’t want him to feel left out or anything.
On second thought, maybe I will call them out by name. Thing 1 and Thing 2, Thing 3 and Thing 4, Thing 5 and the biggest Thing of them all.
* Disclaimer ~ the following post may contain “parent only” language & content. If you think the phrase “You will not believe what was in his poop” might offend you or your stomach, ya might want to just skip down to the next post
1 of our 5 children ~ who I will not name ~ due to the fact that they can read~and sometimes look over my shoulder when I am on the pc~and might see this post and get VERY mad at me~has a blanket (we aren’t mean, they all have blankets). But this is a little blanket. It’s always been little. But it WAS bigger when we first bought it. We have noticed significant shrinkage in the blanket over time.
*Unnamed child, has slowly been eating this blanket for YEARS. Until recently, I didn’t realize that the blanket was actually being eaten. I just thought the child was chewing on the strings and pulling them out. And I am always saying “don’t put that in your mouth, that’s gross.” Apparently, it’s WAYYYY grosser than I thought.
I came home from my favorite place to go and My Love told me that *unnamed child had a stomach ache after I left, but was fine now. Then proceeded to crack up and give me the details.
You will not believe what was in his poop! A string. Yes you read right. A string. Apparently a LOOOONG string.
I said a prayer of Thanks. And sang the Hallelujah chorus. I’m so glad I was gone for that. I don’t think we’ll be serving blanket for dinner anymore. Is it just my children who are this weird? Do your kids have strange blanket~eating fetishes? Should I feed them more maybe?
- Oh wow! I thought funny ‘poop’ stories pretty much stopped by the time kids were potty trained. But then my kids aren’t potty trained so I wouldn’t really know I guess. You definitely lucked out on that one! (missing it that is) I hope your little one is feeling better now and has found something else to snack on!
- He’s feeling much better now, thanks. We’ve moved on to pillowcases
- That us by far THE BEST post I have ever read!!!! THANKS FOR THE LAUGH!!!!!!
6 Comments:
hehe :]